Blue Hawaiian

Summer is fading.  This week has just been rain, rain and more rain (good for the garden, not so good for finishing off the garden) and of course it is meant to rain all weekend long.  Summer is my least favourite season, I don't like the heat and retreat indoors as much as I can.  However all that said it has not stopped raining for so long that right now I could do with some of that summer sun.  Tonight as the rain beats down and Hubby and I snuggle up on the lounge with The Boys, I thought I would make something that should remind me of summer.  I wanted to go with a cocktail that screamed Tropical Island.  Tonight I will be dreaming of my favourite place in the world, Ellis Beach, Tropical North Queensland, sitting in the sun, soaking up the rays, looking out at the glistening ocean and in the far distance watching the storm clouds gather for the evening thunderstorm.  "How's the serenity?"  Tragically with this cocktail it is ruined, but I have to talk about the bad as well as the good, but as Hubby just said to me, "Can't you stick to the classics's?"  Yes Baby, I will.

1 shot Blue Curacao

1 shot White Rum
1 shot Coconut Cream
2 shots Pineapple Juice

Place all ingredientss into a blender with 1 cup of ice and blend until smooth.  Pour into a highball glass.  

Hubby: Coconutty but the coconut cream isn't working, not a nice consistency, 1/5

Me: Looks how a cocktail should but it lacked the full flavour I was expecting, also didn't like the consistency, I prefer my cocktails smoother, 2/5

Perfect for: Trying for it's good looks at a cocktail party once you have passed the point of being tispy and not caring too much about the taste and texture.

Try it: At a cocktail party cos it looks good, that really is all it is good for.

Dear HB...

I finally cancelled my Home Beautiful subscription yesterday, I had been meaning to do it for a while.  As I flipped through the latest issue at lunch I stopped at the reader letters, and thought I should write a letter to the editor.  I know this letter will never be published so I felt posting it on my blog was appropriate. 

Dear HB,

I just wanted to say that I have cancelled my subscription to your magazine.  I first met you when my Husband and I found ourselves building our new home.  I was seduced by your cover and impressed with your content.  I subscribed that month, knowing that this magazine would fill me with inspiration.  As the issues went by I would flip through the pages and wonder what exactly was different from the last issue.  Don't get me wrong, with each issue I would find something in there to be excited about.  I would think, "Yes, I can see that working in our new home" and I would look down the bottom for the price and think, "Actually, no, I do not have $5,000 to dish out on an armchair that can only be used by one person at a time and as nice as it is, I need to be practical". 

And then of course, the Real 'Homes' section,  month after month, a token house from Sydney, always, and then Melbourne, Queensland and now you do at least one house from overseas.  Always, these homes would be with a late 30s early 40s woman with her kids in the background talking about just how fabulous the expensive cushion was on the expensive couch, which is fine when your Husband is earning $100,00 plus, which he must have been because these stories were always something like: Who lives here?  Angela, an interior designer/stay at home mum/executive and her Husband John, CEO/CFO/Director and their two children, Chloe and Maxwell. 

In the end, HB, it's not you, it's me, for I am simply not your target market.  I do not have white walls, and we don't have space for a butler's pantry, nor is our yard big enough for the token swimming pool with the outdoor kitchen/lounge.  I don't want to fill my house with things from a magazine and end up with a cookie cutter house.  I want to fill my home with pieces that tell a story.  I want to walk around and smile at everything, at the memories and I want people to walk into my home and feel instantly at ease, to feel free to relax and be themselves, and to admire our uniqueness and smile at me and say "Where did you get that?" And I will not respond with this designer or that, I will respond and share with them the intimate details of exactly how we obtained this unique, one of a kind item.  Home Beautiful, it's over.

Linking in with Jacana for Totally Thursday 

The Symptoms

I am off to the Dr and the natropath today for a whole lot of tests, so I thought, now that it has been some time since I came off The Pill, to provide a run down on the symptoms that have developed since that time so I have a starting point and in 6 months time I can look back and see what has improved and what else needs doing.

The worst change I have noticed is I have exceptionally oily hair (which is also my number one pet hate I cannot stand it). I have to wash my hair with two shampoos everyday using a really harsh shampoo and if I go out at night I have to wash it again. Because of the shampoo I am using the mid section and roots are very dry that even my straighter can't keep it down.  I am considering chopping it all off into a bob because it is very difficult to wear out right now so almost every day it ends up in a ponytail eventually.  My skin is very oily now also, but I am so fortunate that I am yet to break out which was actually the whole reason why I was put on The Pill in the first place.

I have very rapid hair growth all over, I am doing my legs every 3 weeks now and I have a few hairs popping up on my chin and lip which is a very common symptom of PCOS.  I am yet to ovulate and have only had two long cycles.  I have been tracking my BBT and it reads like a stock market graph with no clear pattern.  My body seems to be suffering from a lot of inflammation, my sinuses are up with a runny none each day, itchy eyes and my asthma is a lot worse. I am not sure if this is related to the situation or just a coincidence. And of course there are the symptoms that I had while I was already on the Pill such as the cysts on the ovaries, insulin resistance, skin tags and the extra weight my with pregnant like PCOS belly. 

It looks bad but it isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be and I feel good about that, of course I have no idea what is going on inside but I will find out soon enough and then that is when the battle really begins.

Mint Julep

My whole life I have only ever wanted to travel to two countries, England (which I achieved if only for a week) and America.  I don't know where this came from but I always had a thing for going to the US and seeing all the things you don't see on the Movies or the TV.  But I didn't want to just travel there for a few weeks and cram in as much as I could, I wanted to live over there for several years and experience all there was.  Of course I could never live anywhere in the world permanently, I would always have to come back Home to Australia.  But after I finished uni, I applied for a Green Card.  I had a vision of going over there, meeting a big burly NFL player and falling madly in love (I was single at the time).  Now things have changed but I would still love to go over there.  Don't tell our parents but we are trying our luck again with the Green Card and hopefully one year we will be lucky enough.  Until then, with Summer starting to slide away and disappear in the next few weeks, I felt this American Classic was just the thing.

2 1/2 shots Bourbon

2 tsp Water
1 tsp Caster Sugar
4 springs Mint

Muddle mint leaves with water and sugar in an old-fashioned glass.  Fill with ice and add Bourbon, mix for a minute or two to dilute and finish with more ice.  

Hubby: Too strong for me, just keep this at one, 2/5

Me: Refreshing, I was surprised how much mint I could taste but I enjoyed the flavour, it mixed well, just sip slowly, 4/5

Perfect for: Summer afternoons sitting outside soaking it up, ideal for horse racing.

Try it: Now, before Summer ends and also in November for the Racing Season.

More Babies

I was in Sydney on Friday for training and in the afternoon during a group discussion on safety, while studying a handful of photos (interestingly enough we were looking at a pregnant woman at a desk ) I looked down at my phone to see a message from my friend at work telling me she was now 8 weeks pregnant and everything was going really well.  I felt so happy for her I wanted to stop what I was doing and race back to the office.  I think if I was at the office I would be screaming and jumping around, so it was probably a good thing I wasn't there.

On the long train ride home my mind started to think less about the day and work and started to think more about babies and I found myself feeling a little melancholy.  When hubby picked me up he knew something was wrong.  I am so happy for my friend but I cannot help but feel a teeny tiny bit jealous.  And the thing is we are not even trying!  And hubby, being the man and having to find a solution to everything told me that, as discussed, we didn't want it to happen this year and gave me all the reasons why.  But it isn't about that.  It is about the fact that if we decided right now that yes, now is the time for a baby, it wouldn't happen.

I have been tracking my cycles ever since I came off The Pill over three months ago.  I am yet to ovulate and without ovulation a baby isn't even possible.  I just feel a little sad and a little frustrated because it isn't an option.  It is not about now or later it is about the fact that there is no option right now.  My fertility is so out of whack that at this point we are forced into the no children category.

After discussing this with my Hubby I felt better.  There have always been comments about when are we going to have a baby/provide a grandchild etc, and lately I have been finding these comments hurtful and invasive and I couldn't work out why.  Now I know. And a very small part of me cannot help but think, what if next year these problems still exist, maybe this is our lot in life.  And yes I am jumping the gun but this is what's in my head right now.  It would just be nice to know there is an option and we can choose.  I just need to keep focusing on my health, my PCOS and all the positives and also how amazing my life already is and just how for fortunate I am to have my husband, who worships the ground I walk on and treats me like a princess because if it is just meant to be the two of us then I could not ask for a better person to travel with.

Between The Sheets

Well Valentines Day is coming up.  Of course I never celebrate it because it is so commercial.  At least that is what I always said when I was single.  Now that I have Hubby I think why not jump right on in.  Naturally you should show the one you love that you love them everyday, and I do as does my Hubby, but for one day every year we get to bask in the cheesiness of it all and find each other the most ridiculous and cheeky cards we can.  And lets face it, you can turn your back on February 14 all you like but when a dozen red roses turn up at the office in front of all the girls you suddenly feel like a Princess who has always celebrated the day.  So for today I thought I would find something that had a little romance in the name of the drink without sounding too.....direct.  Of course I knew this day would eventually come, it had too, trying new ingredients and combinations and for this week, it was a total flop.

1 shot Cointreau

1 shot White Rum
1 shot Brandy
1/2 shot lemon juice

Shake with ice and pour into a Martini glass.  

Hubby: Yuck this just doesn't work, 1/5

Me: Um, just don't think citrus and brandy really go together, 3 sips and I am done 1/5

Perfect for: Maybe as a hangover cure.

Try it: Perhaps don't.

Fashion

I have never been trendy, kinda comes with being a nerd.  I don't go along with everyone else, I like to keep it simple.  In fact this blog could be the trendiest thing I am doing.  I am not even on Facebook because frankly I feel if you want to catch up, pick up the telephone.

So for many years I refused to get an iPhone for the simple reason that everyone else has one and I was not going to succumb to this trend, but at the end of last year Hubby and I were complaining for the millionth time about our crappy non iPhone phones that were less than a year old.  So we gave in, we both had brand new iPhone 5s.  Of course, I couldn't be like everyone else, I had to get myself a really funky case to go with it.  So I got this.

The next day the girls at work were coming up to me oohing and ahhing over the CASE.  At the dentist the other day (Part 2 of root canal) I was sitting in the chair (for an hour) listening to music via my iPhone and the dental assistant stopped what she was doing and pointed to my case "Great case, I love it, where did you get that?"  No one actually cares about the fact I have an iPhone, it is all about the case.

And here is my problem.  The case is very chunky, I guess it has to be with all those crystals, which means my phone doesn't work at home, reception here isn't that great, but with all this extra protection on my phone I get nothing.  Hubby has no problems, but I have nothing.  So what do I do?  Leave the case on and bask in my 15 seconds of fashionable glory or ditch the case and go for practicality, which I always choose anyway.  I am leaning towards the fashion, being undisturbed on weekends while I am at home is not a bad thing, and while people continue to comment I will continue to smile and enjoy this fleeting fad.

Linking up with Jacana for Totally Thursday 

Becoming

"We can't become what we need to be by remaining what we are" - Oprah

I came across this quote yesterday and I cannot stop thinking about it.  I need to print it off onto some fancy paper and stick it all around the house and on my desk at work.  I don't want to say this but I have to; I feel like stumbling across this quote has been my "a-ha" moment, in Oprah speak.  But I need to go back.

I have always known that I would never truly be happy in the career 'segment' in my life until I was my own boss.  Which meant that I would never really be happy until I had my own business.  Throughout my 20's I had thousands of ideas and I would eagerly research those ideas until the next one popped in when I would drop everything and venture forth onto the next topic.  These ideas only ever remained that, ideas.  I was (and still am) the classic dreamer.  But deep down I knew within myself that one day I would be that entrepreneur with my own business living my dream. 

Lately I have felt stagnant at work.  I have been challenged there, but at the end of the day it is still the same thing.  It feels like a production line, but instead of sorting through items on a conveyor belt, you sort through paperwork and do the same thing each day.  I have been thinking about all those dreams I had, all those ideas and my dream of being my own boss and asking myself Why?  And then I found myself thinking, What?  What idea will it be that I finally take hold of and jump off the cliff and give it a go.

And then I read that quote yesterday.  I am not ready.  I need to become that woman in my head I visit everyday that has the life I envy, but I am not her yet and I never will be if I stay as I am.  That was the whole goal for 2013, to become that person and at the end of the year be ready to take those steps from turning dreams into something real.  The last month has felt like a lot of fluffing, a lot of 'paper sorting' but this quote is a nice reminder that I actually need to take action, I need to change and I need to become. 

Frozen Grasshopper

Summer.  Remember the ice cream man?  You would hear that music and immediately I was running around the house trying to find mum and asking for money.  She could give me and my brother a few dollars and it was off down the driveway hoping we had not missed him.  Most of the time I ordered choc mint ice cream.  It was my favourite flavour.  Green was my favourite colour and I loved the crunchy choc bits in it.  We would get our ice creams and sit on the steps outside the front of the house, absorbed in the sugary goodness, watching the afternoon pass by.  As school goes back this week I thought it was fitting to take myself back to those Summer Dayz.  

1 shot white creme de cacao

1 shot green creme de menthe
3 scoops of vanilla ice cream

Put all ingredients into a blender and blend until combined.  Pour into a Martini glass.  

Hubby: Just like choc mint ice cream only boozy, 4.5/5

Me: Heaven!  A naughty version of choc mint ice cream, what more is there to say, 5/5

Perfect for: Anytime during Summer, serve as dessert after a classic summer meal.

Try it: When you hear the sound of the ice cream man, because you know you won't be running after that truck.