It's Finally Arrived

I have been waiting 9 months for this moment and I feel about a week ago it arrived.  The shift into Autumn finally came about in our little part of the world.  The weekend was wonderful with lots of light drizzly rain, and as I lay back onto our couch with the window open, a crisp breeze floated through and ran across me.  The air was so fresh and cool and alerted me to the fact that we were now truly in Autumn, my favourite time of year.  I almost cried I felt so good. 

This time of year is truly magical.  The light is different, it is softer and in the afternoon everything lights up with a glow, a gentle warm radiation without the harshness of the Summer sun.  There is nothing better than being outside on a Sunny day basking in the warmth of the sun with a light cool breeze occasionally meandering around, that makes you snuggle into your clothes just a little bit more.  

Ah! the snuggling.  Lazy days inside, cuddled up in blankets and devouring good books with a sneaky glass of full bodied red wine in the other hand. And if you are so fortunate, the crackling of an open fire provides perfect background noise. 

For me the most enchanting thing about this time of year is that it takes me back to our wedding.  A perfect Autumn day followed by a late lunch in front of an open fire.  Which of course is the best way to spend these Autumnal Days.  We married in the country.  A place that feels like home everytime we visit.  We always ended up in this country town in the Autumn and one time as we were driving through admiring the red, gold and brown leaves on the trees, I made the suggestion that perhaps we should get married there.  Hubby was sold on the idea once we checked out a 100 year old Guesthouse, we knew we didn't need to look any further.  

While this season has a special place in our hearts, so does that country town.  It feels like home because one day it will be.  It is the only place I have ever been that just feels right deep down.  The one place that makes me think, yes, I could stay here for the rest of my life.  And this season brings back all those wonderful memories, and as I find myself reaching for another layer of clothing, I start to dream about our future and wondering what other wonderful memories are yet to be created.

Embracing

(I don't have a habit of letting Mr C eat my shoes, I turned around and this is how I found him)

Lately things have changed a little.  We seem to have found our niche and spot in this world and we are embracing just who we are.  In all honesty I have never been one to try and fit in with the crowd, I have never felt that I was ever in the crowd, but more standing back doing my own thing and occasionally glancing over at what everyone else was doing and thinking "What's the big deal?".

Our house will never be featured in a magazine, the walls are not white and I have a thing for colour.  We don't fill our house with things from the shops, things that everyone else has, and I really am not too fussed about throw cushions.  Aside from our bed and rumpus lounge, our house is full of second hand furniture, either from family or from second-hand vintage warehouses.  And the items that fill in the gaps are hand made and we have been fortunate enough in some instances to have spoken to the creator of the items themselves.  Our style is organic, natural, and most importantly, unique.

I do not like shopping.  Every now and then I would love a day in The City (with an unlimited Credit Card) to spend with my mum where we shop to our hearts content and have lunch at David Jones by the window overlooking Hyde Park.  Outside this I am not a fan.  I go to the shops when I need to, and by that I mean when I cannot get something online.

Some weekends are spent at home, we lock ourselves in our house and just chill with The Boys.  We don't feel the need to go out all the time, being introverts we get our energy from just being at home.  We are homebodies to the extreme and lately I have thought, why fight it?  What is so wrong with wanting to spend a day with my husband at home, pottering and snuggling on the couch watching Seinfeld for the 100th time?  In fact I really love getting up early on a Saturday morning and doing housework, to me it feel so satisfying, I would rather do that then go off to Westfield.

When we are not being homebodies we are out indulging in food and wine and antiques.  We love to explore country towns, popping into antique stores, we love to collect old books, for Hubby it is Engineering and for me it is Agriculture and Australian Classics, for most that would seem weird, but we love it.  We love to eat at good restaurants where they grow the food on site and where someone talks to you at the table to explain in great detail about your meal and of course to enjoy the meal with a great glass of wine.  I get a real kick from boutique wineries were we are the only people at the cellar door and the winemaker/owner takes the time to tell us their secrets and stories in each bottle of wine.  We seem to make instant friends with those who are as passionate about these things as we are.

Monday morning as people discuss their weekends at work I cannot help but think how different we are.  But why fight who we are?  We are now finding ourselves as a couple and embracing everything we have in common and all our passions and I could not be happier.  You really have two options when you wake up each day.  Choose to be happy and true to yourself

Reflections

Hubby and I started 2012 with only 2 goals set for the year.  The first was to move into the house that was 2 years in the making and the second was to get married.  We knew that both these goals would be achieved in the first half of the year, but did not want to set any goals for the second half of the year because we felt we just wouldn't have anything left in us after those two goals.  We were right.  In fact it has only been in the last month or so that I have started to feel the urge to set some more goals and start achieving again.

A month before our wedding we moved into our first house.  It was just over two years from when we paid the initial deposit on the land and the journey to that point was a tough one, and a huge learning experience.  I love our house and I love that in the end we got there.  People ask if we would do it again.  The answer is No.  If we could go back we wouldn't have taken this path, but that does not mean we regret it, we have no regrets.  I still walk around our house, knowing I am free to hang up a picture and change the paint colour and I feel I am in dream.  Sometimes it doesn't seem real and I have to pinch myself.  Hubby and I worked hard for this and it was worth it.  We are both so fortunate to live here and to live in our beautiful house.

Then there was the wedding.  It was an intimate affair, we ran away to the country, 6 hours from home, rented out a 100 year old Summer House and eloped.  We did invite our parents and siblings and Hubby's godparents, and they were our only guests.  We were married in a little white country church and the bell was rung by my brother after the ceremony.  We were driven around in a 1950's Jag for our photos before our late lunch reception in the Great Hall of the Summer House.  It was autumn, both fireplaces were roaring and all 10 of us sat around one table in front of the fire.  There were tears of joy, smiles and lots of laughter.  After the photographer left we all changed into more relaxing clothing and chatted by the fire.  Hubby and I finally had a chance to be alone and we sat in our spa for half an hour talking about the day.  Finally, we were Husband and Wife.  We then joined our families for a light supper of home made soup where the night was spent eating, drinking and singing.  The next day our families left and we had a day to relax before embarking on a month long road trip Honeymoon.

The second half of the year has been spent working on our house and settling into married life.  For the first time in our relationship we had the chance to just Be.  2012 has been the best year of my life and it will always be a special year for us.  I look back on this year with so many happy memories and I can only look back and smile.

Dear Hubby, Six Months

Have we really been married half a year already? Sometimes I look at you and struggle to believe we are actually married.  But then I struggle to remember my life before you.  It just seems you have always been there by my side.

The last three months have been a little tough.  Life became so busy and we were immersed in everything that needed to be done.  Our heads were down churning through everything and we didn't take the time to look across at each other and smile.  We talked everyday but I think for a few weeks we just didn't connect.  The words "marriage is work" echoed in my head and we stopped and looked at each other.  "Hello, I am so glad to see you again".  We realised that no matter what, we needed to make "us" a priority, and put "us" first before everyone/everything else.  It was good.  We talk now, just like before but also deeper.  We connect and I believe we are working as a new team, more in sync than ever before.

I am starting to see that things are different now, different to when we were just living together.  There is power in those promises and commitments we made to each other, in front of our families, sealed with a ring and signing our Certificate of Marriage.  I was told the other day that the first 3 years of marriage are the hardest.  If that is the case then I know we have nothing to worry about, but then we have always known this was for a lifetime.

I smile when I call you my husband.  It still feels new to me.  In fact only yesterday I almost signed my old name and had to pause as my pen hit the paper as I suddenly remembered I share your name now. I find myself most days looking down at my ring and smiling, remembering The Day. 

To you my Husband, Happy 6 Months, our married life is truly just beginning and we have so many exciting things coming up I know the next 6 months are going to be even better.  With all my Love, your Wife.

Dear Hubby - three-ish months

Husband.  Finally I get to call you that.  I was never comfortable calling you my boyfriend or partner and fiance just didn't seem to work either.  But now I can say "Hubby".  Actually to be honest it still feels a little weird calling you that.  Everyone knows we are newlyweds and when I say that word I swear I can see them almost smirk at me, thinking that I like to throw that word around now.  And I do like to use it whenever I can.  I think some people have even forgotten your name.  You are now My Husband.

I knew the moment I met you.  That moment at the top of the stairs before I even walked into the same room as you, I saw you.  You looked up and caught my eye and in that moment, I knew.  At the time I was highly cynical so my first thought was actually "Wouldn't it be funny if that was my future husband."  Turns out, you were.  I don't know if it was funny.  We laugh, we have good times, but in that moment, it was life changing.  Although that bit I didn't know about until a little later on.

It is still life changing.  You turned my world upside down and suddenly I wanted to be a better person.  I still do.  I would never have done half the things we have done together if you didn't turn up.  Suddenly the world made a lot of sense.

So, here we are, married.  I remember a lot of people telling me that once you are married, everything changes and it changes for the better.  I was concerned because at the 6-ish week mark I didn't think much had changed.  I talked to C and she asked me if it was good before the wedding.  I told her it was great.  She asked what I wanted to change, I told her nothing.  So in her words, "What is the problem?"  Nothing at all.  The only change I have noticed is that suddenly we are clucky.  While we are not about to rush out into the world of parenthood I do remember many nights pre wedding, when we would sit and fantasize about our future, childless life.  Oh, it was wonderful.  We were going to travel the world, eat at the best restaurants, sipping only the finest wine.  The future was full of glamour and doing as we pleased.  All.  The.  Time.  Now we find ourselves thinking about what a little version of us would look like, and pondering baby names.  Maybe we will have children.  Maybe.

So my darling, happy 3-ish months, I love you.

Change

The weekend just passed was hopefully our last weekend for a while in running around and getting stuff done.  One thing I (finally) did achieve was going to the RTA/RMS to change my surname.  I took a number, waited, handed over my marriage certificate, had my photo taken and five minutes later I was handed a new licence with Mrs J on it.

Hubby was beaming.  "It's official now" he said as we walked back to the car.  I held out my left  hand and asked if the ring that he made for me wasn't enough.  He said he was just happy that we now had the same surname.

This was a big deal for me.  When we first became engaged we had this conversation many times and each time I couldn't seem to win.  Maybe win isn't the right word.  I wanted both surnames.  Actually I wanted Hubby to take both surnames as well.  After all, by the time we were married I would have spent almost 30 years with my maiden name and I did not want to give it up.  For some people it is just a name, but for me I felt like it was so ingrained in my identity.   Hubby is normally so carefree, laid back, go with the flow, but with this conversation he became fired up and passionate.  It was tradition, it was his legacy and I think the word manhood even came into it.  

In the end, I did want us to have the same surname.  I wanted us to be Mr & Mrs J, and should our family expand, for our children to have the same surname as us.  Hubby wasn't going to take on mine so I agreed that I would take his, however I would be keeping my maiden name for work.  Hubby was more than happy with this arrangement.

Right now everything feels as it always has been.  Maybe it is just a name.  I do not feel any different as a person and in all honesty I am happy that we can now receive mail with Mr & Mrs J on it.  Now (on paper) we looked married, and I am excited to (officially) call myself Mrs J.  

Wow, I am a married woman, what on earth would Miss R have to say about that?

Not Happy

Hubby was sick all last week.  I thought he was 90% better yesterday.  By this stage I was feeling quite smug that he had not passed it onto me and figured that the recent health changes I have been making had something to do with it.  Then after dinner everything changed.  I was sneezing and blowing my nose and tossing and turning for half the night before finally getting up in a hot sweat at around 2am when I realised that he had successfully managed to pass his "man flu" (now real flu) to me. 

I was sent home from work at lunch time today and have spent the rest of the afternoon on the couch watching bad TV and progressively working my way through a tissue box. 

Now waiting for Hubby to come home and take care of me, just as I did for him last week.

Welcome to Married Life.  Share the Germs.