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12:30am.  Awake.  Again.  I am so tired all the time now and while I have been sleeping well I still find myself with a little insomnia once or twice a week.  Apparently I am quite low in iron, which might explain a bit.  Although really that is the least of my worries.  I have gone from being only just pre-diabetic to very close to actually being diabetic. 

It is still sinking in.  I was not expecting it to be good, but I didn't quite expect it to be so bad.  The good news is, it is still reversible and my Dr believes I can get back to a normal range withing 12 months.  Of course that will require a lot of hard work on my part.  She told me I needed to stop talking about what I was going to do and actually do it.  Ouch.  Although very true.  And I really did need to hear that.  She also said that I have so much energy and I am always working on many different projects at one time, why don't I use some of that energy on myself?  Good Point.  Why don't I?

I have withdrawn a little since I heard the news.  I needed to just think.  I still am thinking and processing but I am not in denial anymore.  Things need to change, and not just a little, a lot.  And they need to change now.  

I took on board everything she said and discussed with Hubby.  There is still so much to talk about and generally sort out but our health is now moving its way up to become our number one priority.  We are going to spend a few hours on the weekend sorting out the detail.  It is hard to do that right now, each night I come home so tired.  With little energy.  It is a 'Catch 22' really.  I have no energy because of my poor health, yet the low energy makes it difficult to change things.  I have no choice anymore though.  Now is the time for change.  Big change.  Permanent change.  And right now, it is time to go back to bed.