The Dog Test

I stumbled upon this Parenting Test the other day as I was surfing the web and then I started thinking.  What would a dog test look like for someone considering getting a dog....

The Dog Test 

Test 1

Spend a day going to every hairdresser within a 50 km radius of your house.  Collect all the swept up hair that was cut that day and place in a garbage bag.  You will need several bags.  When you get home empty the bags all over the house, ensuring each room has a collection of hair on the floor and noting also to spread over the furniture and a few items of clothing (black is ideal).  Do not get the vacuum just yet, try to live with it.

Test 2

Drink lots and lots of water.  When you need to go to the toilet just take your undies off and go where you are standing, carpet is a better choice than tiles.  Once done, clean it up.  Ensure that you also try and find a few spots to go that are in hard to reach corners, such as behind an armchair.  This way the mess cannot be seen and can only be smelt a few days later.  

Test 3

Go to a local daycare/playcentre and ask to borrow all the plastic play balls the kids play with.  Dump these balls onto the kitchen floor ensuring full coverage.  Now attempt to make dinner without stepping on any balls.

Test 4

When you have a few moments of quite time find your favourite chair and read a book/watch a DVD/ do whatever makes you happy.  Have a family member jump up on you and climb over you as much as possible.  Attempt to continue on with your activity.

Test 5

Go for a walk.  Stop for 30 seconds at every object that comes from the ground, both natural and artificial, notice that your 15 minute walk suddenly turns into a 30 minutes one.  Ideally go to the toilet on this walk, preferably not long after leaving and carry it with you for the rest of the way.

Test 6

Whenever you have something important to do at home, have a family member stand at the back door and scratch away at it while making dog like noises until it drives you to the point of letting them inside the house.

Test 7

Every time you sit down at the table to eat have a family member sit on the floor and start to jump up on you, have them scratch your leg and when you do not give them food straight away have them start barking at you.   Finish your meal.

Can you think of any other tests to include?

A Funny Thing Happened This Morning

 

Hubby has two cars, his normal car and then he has his sports car.  An old yellow Mazda something-or-other that he bought when he was single and did up when he was single.  He is always meant to be selling it.  It was originally going to be sold to help pay for some of the costs of moving in together, then later to help buy the block of land, then to help with the wedding and most recently to assist with finishing off the house.  It still sits in the garage and I no longer factor in the several thousand that we could have.

Hubby has a really bad habit of clearing out his car and leaving everything in a bag that he just dumps at random in the garage.  I ask him to bring it inside the kitchen and we can sort it out together.  It never amounts to much stuff, just a few random items that would take less than 5 minutes to put away.  We went to a BBQ the other night.  I made a dish and brought with me a large serving of rice to go with it.  The rice was in one of Mum's old Corningware dishes.  Classic retro.  Before we went home that night our host gave us a nice bottle of wine.  As we pulled into the drive we collected what we could and left the rest for the morning, which somehow never happened.  Well Hubby cleared the car out a few days ago and left these items in a bag in the garage.  I refused to move them.  I snapped.  I had enough.  Everyday since I would come home, open the garage and see this bag staring at me, but I remained firm, I was not going to touch the bag.

Hubby felt this morning he would take the yellow car to work and give it a run.  I kissed him goodbye and as I went to fix my hair I heard the car engine rev up.  I heard him move down the drive and then I heard the engine sitting idle.  I stuck my head out the front door and the car was on the other side of the road and in the middle of the road was this bag of 'stuff'.  He had forgotten he had placed the bag behind the yellow car and therefore failed to move the bag out of the way, and as he reversed the bag went with him.  Hubby was walking across the road picking up a few items.  A large 4WD doing about 90km (in a 60 zone) came speeding along, Hubby got out of the way and this idiot driver hit the Corningware.  I heard the pop of his tyre, and saw the splatter of glass and china go everywhere followed by a shower of rice.  The driver turned the corner and was gone and I stood in the front door unsure whether to laugh or cry.  Hubby walked up to me. At least he had saved the wine.

A Little Passion For Wine

I was a nerd at school (and yes parts of that have carried through) aside from the odd swig of beer from Dad when I was a kid (that I couldn't stand the taste) I actually didn't drink until I was 18.  I started on "Stollies" (Vodka and Lemon) that was really all I could stomach.  A few months after turning 18 I went to stay with my Aunt and Uncle in Victoria.  My cousin was in Year 12 with me and my parents thought I needed a break in scenery and sent me down to study with him.  My Uncle was a huge Wine Buff.  I remember for dinner he opened a bottle of red and asked if I wanted a glass, I told him I was not sure.  He poured me some, I didn't like it.  He laughed and told me that red wine was an acquired taste and that I needed to stick with it and after several attempts I would be able to drink a full glass.

I do not know why, but it stuck and I did persevere with it.  Within a few weeks I could drink a glass of red.  In fact that was all I could drink, I wasn't even into white.  So while my friends started drinking 'Breezers' I was into the more finer things in life.

Sure enough as life went on, my palate for wine developed and I was off on day trips to the Hunter Valley educating myself.  Let me be clear though, for I want to establish that I am not one of those people.  The ones starting with a W, or a wine snob.  I just knew what I liked and what I didn't and I wasn't afraid to say it.  I was not carrying a notebook with me and standing in a cellar door bragging that I could make the distinction between American Oak and French Oak in the 2002 Shiraz.  No, I was the one that told the nice young man behind the counter that I prefer my white wines with balls.

Having altered our road trip Honeymoon to include a few wine tours, you could say that wine is a little bit of a hobby for me.  And I would have to agree.  So when it came time to pick a name for the newest member of our family I knew it would need to be a wine, just like Mr C.  We decided on Shiraz, Hubby only agreed to this because in public we could just yell out 'Raz' or 'Razzie'.  Although now that he has come into our lives I hear Hubby yelling out "Shirazie" all the time.  Seems someone else has turned into a little wine snob themselves.

Dear Hubby, Six Months

Have we really been married half a year already? Sometimes I look at you and struggle to believe we are actually married.  But then I struggle to remember my life before you.  It just seems you have always been there by my side.

The last three months have been a little tough.  Life became so busy and we were immersed in everything that needed to be done.  Our heads were down churning through everything and we didn't take the time to look across at each other and smile.  We talked everyday but I think for a few weeks we just didn't connect.  The words "marriage is work" echoed in my head and we stopped and looked at each other.  "Hello, I am so glad to see you again".  We realised that no matter what, we needed to make "us" a priority, and put "us" first before everyone/everything else.  It was good.  We talk now, just like before but also deeper.  We connect and I believe we are working as a new team, more in sync than ever before.

I am starting to see that things are different now, different to when we were just living together.  There is power in those promises and commitments we made to each other, in front of our families, sealed with a ring and signing our Certificate of Marriage.  I was told the other day that the first 3 years of marriage are the hardest.  If that is the case then I know we have nothing to worry about, but then we have always known this was for a lifetime.

I smile when I call you my husband.  It still feels new to me.  In fact only yesterday I almost signed my old name and had to pause as my pen hit the paper as I suddenly remembered I share your name now. I find myself most days looking down at my ring and smiling, remembering The Day. 

To you my Husband, Happy 6 Months, our married life is truly just beginning and we have so many exciting things coming up I know the next 6 months are going to be even better.  With all my Love, your Wife.

The Rural Escape - Reason #1

One reason I set up this blog was because I wanted a space to dream about our goal of one day living in rural Australia on a very large parcel of land with all the animals and plants we can possibly get away with.  I love where I am now, but I do get frustrated, so in an attempt to focus on my goal, make me smile and get out all my frustrations, I felt it was time to start making a list of reasons why we want this dream.

I want our Rural Escape so I can walk around my backyard naked if I choose too.  Now, I do not walk around my backyard naked here.  I have never walked around naked outside my house ever before in my life.  However, should I suddenly feel like doing so, it would be nice to know I would have the freedom to step out the back door and go for a stroll in total confidence that no one can see me.

Our house now.  On the Eastern side, we sit above our neighbour, we can see everything that goes on in their backyard, including the recent birthday party they had for one of the children.  We can also see what goes on in the backroom as the large windows do not have any window dressings.  Just to be clear, we do not make a habit of looking over, we are not those kind of neighbours, and I make a point of keeping my head down and not looking over, but we can if we want.

To our West, our neighbours are higher than us and as such can sneak a look into our yard.  I know this because our sliding door faces directly from a bedroom window in the neighbours house and when a van pulled up in front of our house with our blinds, I went around every room pulling off the sheets we used as a temporary cover and there was our neighbour 'having a sticky' from her window.  The first of many such "Stickys".

Hubby and I are very private people, we like our lives to be private and we respect other people's privacy, Hubby is from a small acreage himself.  It would just be really nice to walk outside knowing no one can see you.  In a world where everything is recorded having our own truly private oasis would be a little slice of heaven.

Mix Tape

I had the sudden urge on the weekend to get stuck into the 'junk room' of the house.  The one room with all the remaining boxes.  We are down to the really old stuff now, the stuff that was boxed up in the back of our wardrobes before we even met.  I found at least 50 cassette tapes.  Remember those?? I also found an old portable tape player (not a Walkman, this was a tape Dictaphone), and yes it still worked.  I was in early 90's pre teen HEAVEN!!

So many memories, I remember the Top 40 Countdown on Sunday nights and I would sit in my room listening with a tape in the tape deck and my finger just above the record button (tape, deck, button, I am so old) just waiting for the DJ to stop so I could record the song.  And you had to be ready for the end, so you could press stop just as the ad came on.  I would sit happily for a few hours doing my own thing recording the songs I wanted.  Then on the Monday when I came home from school I would put my mix tape on and listen to the songs, and there was always at the start and end of each song the last few words of the DJ or the first few words of an ad, and then the next song would start.  If you really liked a song you would have to rewind it and stop and start and stop and start to find the start of the song.  Tough, but on the weekend I longed for those days.

Then there was uni.  My uni was really up on technology.  They recorded the lectures.  So if you weren't big on attending the lectures (like me), it was wonderful.  On Friday morning you would go to the library and enter through the special door into the Reserve and walk up to the shelves covered in cassette tapes.  You would pick up the tapes from all your lectures that week and walk into a special room that had a very special machine.  You would empty your bag and pull out the 10 cassette tapes you brought with you and into the machine goes your tape and the lecture tape and in less than 5 minutes you had copied that lecture onto your tape.  Then at home I would listen to my lecture, stop, start, rewind, fast forward and then do it all again the following week. In my third year I discovered I could enrol myself in the subject externally and the Distance Education Department would just post me the tapes.  Those were the days.

Finally, not long after uni, inspired by those early reality TV shows, I felt I needed to learn to sing.  My singing teacher asked me to bring in tapes and would record our lessons so I could go home, listen and practice.  I found those tapes on the weekend.  It should have been uncomfortable, but it wasn't.  I remember how much I enjoyed singing and I found myself smiling at all the silly things she had me sing.  It was a time I had forgotten about until now and it has stuck.  I didn't care back then what I did, I did whatever it was that made me happy, and I need to inject a little of that back into my life each day.  Now please tell me I am not the only one that remembers cassette tapes!

Changes

Things have been busy around here.  Mostly I have been busy.  I am not sure what it was exactly but in the last few weeks I have looked really hard at myself and my life.  I have known for a while I was going to reach this point because things have been uncomfortable.  In fact I was eagerly waiting for this point to happen.  It wasn't a moment as such, I didn't have a sudden realisation and suddenly everything changed, but more a growing awareness and for the last few weeks looking in.  As I look back now I can see that things have changed, permanently and for the better, but I cannot pinpoint an exact moment in time.

Basically it was time I walked my walk.  Time to live true to my values.  I think my health was the biggest thing.  I have known for a long time now what is wrong and what I need to do about it, but I have only ever put in minimal effort.  It was time I stopped talking about what I needed to be doing and just do it.  

A few weeks ago I started on some affirmations I have had for years.  Another thing I knew I should do, but never did.  I was meant to read them out loud in front of the mirror.  I couldn't even look myself in the mirror and say "I love you".  I started just reading them, a few days later I said them out loud, although it was just a whisper.  But each day my voice started to get louder.  I then repeated them in front of the mirror, but I wouldn't take my eyes of the sheet of paper.  Now I stare at myself in the mirror and say my affirmations out loud, to myself, with a smile.  I can even say "I Love You.".  

It is this single act alone of reading my affirmations that has enable me to completely change my life.  I come home now, and instead of sitting on the couch for 3 hours (and then complain the next day I have no time for anything) I get housework done, I cook, I clean, I spend time with Hubby just talking.  I play with the dogs, I read, I talk to my family on the phone.  I get the bills and other paperwork sorted.  I wake up in the morning and I walk, I have breakfast, I get the dogs ready, I make lunch.  I get to work and as soon as I sit at my desk I get started.  In every aspect of my life I am more productive than I ever have been.

I am happy now, I truly feel that I am now creating the life I always wanted.  There is still so much to do, and it isn't always easy, but now I am moving forward.  I think before I was just in a rut, it wasn't laziness per se, but more habit.  It was comfortable and really, I didn't know any different, but with that was the uncomfortable feeling that something wasn't right, that my dreams were just that, dreams, a fantasy life I was not on the path to achieving.  But now I feel I am on that path heading in the right direction.  I am not even sure of the end point, I don't even think there has to be one, for now it is about health and wellness and putting first what matters most and throwing out all the meaningless crap, physical, mental and emotional, it is time to stop planning for my life and to begin to live it.