Brandy Alexander

It has been too long between Cocktail drinks, posts and this is way overdue.  Winter is now officially here and although it is tempting to reach out for an aged Shiraz there are many cocktails that can warm you up from the inside and they are what I want to explore for the next 3 months.  First up is the Brandy Alexander which I do believe was my first ever cocktail that I had at a Chinese Restaurant not long after my 18th birthday (I was and still am a nerd, I did wait till I was 18 to drink, except on a few occasions.....).  This would have to be one of the best cocktails to try if you are new to cocktails or are yet to find one you like.  Not too sweet, and rich and creamy with the brandy giving it just the right amount of kick to have your tummy buzzing with warmth.  This is what I will always order when I cannot decide because I know I will like it and it is near impossible to get wrong.  The only problem being some places always seem to be out of cream.....

1 shot Brandy

1 shot Brown Creme de Cacao
2 shots Cream

Shake all the ingredients with ice and strain into a cocktail glass, garnish with grated nutmeg

Hubby: Too easy to drink, 4/5

Me: Rich and creamy, just enough alcohol to take the edge off but also to keep you standing up for the night, 5/5

Perfect for: Early evenings when you have some time to just sit and reflect (or first dates with Peggy Olson if you are a Mad Men fan)

Try it: Anytime the temperature drops below 20°C

Maybe They're Happy

I remember being very young when I was taught the lesson of 'Do not judge a book by it's cover'.  I have always tried to not judge and make assumptions about people I meet and instead allow myself to learn about someone by getting to know them.  Unfortunately not everyone takes this approach, and they make judgements about people straight away.  Unfortunately for me I work with a few people that are very quick to judge.  These same people also like to share that judgement with me, before I even have a chance to see the people they are making the judgements about.

The nature of my work involves people sharing their private information, acknowledging that death is a part of life and, often, unburdening family conflict.  This is difficult to do and for many they don't want to do it alone.  They will bring someone with them, usually a partner, or a friend, or a child.  The work we do is confronting and people don't want to think about it.  Even I don't like to think about it.  It took me a while to be able to switch off and stand back and see that it was just a job.  Sometime back we needed a temporary receptionist as our permanent one was moved into another role.  The person they hired was the most judgemental person I do believe I have come across.  And she is still with us.

She loves to personally come to my desk to alert me to the fact that my appointment has arrived.  And then with her voice lowered, she whispers her assumptions of that client.  I never take notice of her judgements, because I have found that almost 100% of the time she is wrong.  She will tell me a client is difficult and rude, yet when I talk to them I find them easy going and pleasant.  She will tell me a client is wasting our time as they have no money yet they are multimillionaires.  And many times when a husband and wife come in she loves to tell me it is a second marriage and she only wants his money, "after all, she is young enough to be his daughter".

The other day I did have a husband and wife come in, and it was a second marriage, and she was young enough to be his daughter, in fact she was younger than his daughter.  But so what!  After spending an hour with this couple it was clear they were both happy.  To be completely honest I couldn't say whether they were truly in love, but I could say they were both happy with whatever arrangement they had going on.  They both wanted a companion and had found each other, both fulfilling the needs of the other while having their own needs met.  And in a way isn't that part of what marriage is about?  And aren't we all striving for happiness anyway?  At the end of the day, maybe people are happy with what they have going on, and who are we to judge them for their choices and what it takes to make them happy.  Instead it is time to stop analysing the lives of others and to look at our own lives, and do what we need to do in order to ensure our own happiness.

Wash Your Mouth Out

I opened up my email the other day and while scrolling through I decided to check out the one from my local healthfood shop.  They mentioned a few things and then promoted a seminar, which, as I began reading, I thought sounded good.  That was until I read the title of the seminar, smack bang in the middle of the title was a 4 letter swear word starting with 'S'.  I didn't bother reading any further, I already knew that I didn't want to attend this seminar.

I seem to belong to a shrinking group of people who finds swearing offensive.  It is so mainstream now,  4 letter words are no longer "bleeped" from the television and almost every program on TV begins with "moderate course language".  It is part of everyday life and even now everyday language.  People swear everyday in their day to day conversations and no one blinks an eye.  I will raise my hand and say I do swear, I'm not proud of it but I do.  When I am around people that swear excessively I have been known to throw my own choice words into the mix.  And I know when I am mega stressed or exceptionally angry, the expletives come out of my mouth at full force.  I try to be mindful at all times and am constantly working to get all swear words out of my vocabulary.

When people swear I do find it offensive.  I find it inappropriate and I think the person using the swear words may have a little bit of a self esteem issue, why else would they need to use filthy language.  I remember buying a best selling book that everyone was raging about so much so they turned it into a TV series.  Every.  Single.  Page.  Of that book had at least one swear word.  I was so offended around page 50 I gave up, I wasn't going to go any further.  A very popular blogger turned author who I followed for many years starting introducing 4 letter words into her writing.  It didn't go unnoticed by me and it changed my opinion of her.  

Call me a prude but is all this swearing necessary?  Do we really need to colour our language simply to get the point across?  Does dropping the f-bomb emphasise a point better than omitting it's use?  I went back to the email that started this thinking and read a little deeper.  I was informed that her "casual use" of swear words was "a refreshing reprieve from the norm" (really, I would have thought it was the norm), and that her use of swear words was "reminding you that you are speaking to a real person".  Seriously?  I need someone to use offensive language so I know it's real?

Call me old school but I believe in old fashioned manners.  I don't answer my phone when I'm out at dinner, I always thank clients for coming in to see me and I use the words 'please' when asking for something.  And I try to keep my language clean.  In this 'modern age' I find it hard, particularly when everyone around me seems to be doing it and fail as often as I do, I just need to keep going and keep being mindful, because clean language will set me apart from the rest.  For the better.

Parlo Italiano

At the beginning of the year, I was determined that we were going to do something different.  Something to get us out of the house, meeting new people and using either our brains or our bodies.  I wanted to feel like I did more this year than just work.  It was the end of January and while making dinner, the TV was switched onto the tennis.  My mum had introduced me to the sport at a very young age and, like her, I had fallen in love with it. However like so many other things, as I grew up and entered the real world, I suddenly had very little time for my passions and hobbies.  I remember flicking through the local paper and an advertisement caught me eyes.  "Anyone for Tennis?" Why, yes actually, maybe me.  I told Hubby, this was it, I was going to get back into tennis this year, not only would I meet new people, get out of the house but I would also be working on my fitness as a result.

The open day to sign up for the tennis was on Friday.  On Monday I was surfing the web and came across the local community college and while flipping through the virtual course guide, I noticed they were offering Italian.  Hubby and I had talked for years that one day we would like to learn a language, if only to be able to sit in a restaurant and speak it safe in the knowledge that (hopefully) no one could understand (I'm sure we are not alone with this fantasy).  We had narrowed down the language selection to a few and Italian was top of the list.  I have always loved the Italian language, it is so musical and rhythmic and I love the passion with which the natives speak.  I was fortunate many, many, many, years ago to have visited Italy for a week and I fell in love with the country on day one.  In Year 11 I took up Italian (introductory) as an elective.  However while studying other subjects and working part time, I couldn't devote as much time as I should have to the language and by the end of the year I dropped it, as I felt it would bring my marks down in Year 12.  I was determined, however, that one day I would devote myself to the study of the language and make good on my goal.

I suggested to Hubby that perhaps we could do Italian.  He was interested but suggested we do that or tennis, not both.  I was in a conundrum, on one side I wanted to get back into tennis, and tennis also sat alongside some other goals, like getting fitter, but on the other side I wanted to take the opportunity to learn Italian, properly this time and being an evening class if we said next time who knows when that next time would come, things may change and we may loose our evenings for several years.  With a day before the class was meant to start, we choose Italian.  Tennis would always be there, Italian, maybe not.  When we arrived at our first class and met our wonderful teacher, I knew we had made the right choice.

We have been fortunate enough that Level 2 was offered this term and have been able to continue our learning.  I practise at home when I can and Hubby and I will speak what we can to each other, practising our pronounciation, as well at pointing out objects and saying the word in Italian to increase our vocabulary.  There is so much to learn and it will take years before we could ever speak it fluently, but we are enjoying learning a new skill and increasing our knowledge each week and we plan to continue on with the study for as long as we can.  And even though we only took up the subject because we both have a love for the language and the culture, I think we might just have to plan a visit over there one day, so we can put our skills to good use and soak up the culture, and of course the food and wine.